Life is only a series of moments; as I plan for the next second, next minute, next day and the next year, I watch the present disappear ever so discretely.
As a child I did better. My thoughts were consumed of only what I was doing at that very moment- such as eating a bag of popcorn or watching cartoon. Then, in my teenage years, I started to dwell on the tomorrow; i.e. what to wear the next day or how to be popular. I got older and society and parents taught me to think about what I want to be when I grow up! What to study, how to make money, when to get married and have kids. Consequently, as I was doing the “right thing”, and rightfully so, I forgot to enjoy what it means to be a free spirit, or recognize my potential during the earlier years of life. As a result, I didn’t take the time to enjoy my studies, take more general education, learn a new language, or even learn to relax.
The loss of the present moment becomes more apparent when I look at old photos: photos that take me back to what I was feeling when I took the picture or the moment that I first saw the photo-whether I liked it or not-how critical I was of my face, hair or makeup-but then ten years later, I see the same photo and wonder when my face aged, and how ignorant I was of my youth. Yet, I catch myself repeating the same scenario this new decade-zillion of moments later!
At 39, I ran my first Los Angeles marathon. Having finished it, I was proud-yet, it was another reminder of how much better I would have done had I been 18. Even when I did finish it, I wanted to do better right away, consequently, losing that moment, once again.
Marcus Aurelius , a roman emperor and philosopher, said “Time is a violent torrent; no sooner is a thing brought to sight than it is swept by, and another takes its place, before this too will be swept away”. As I get older, I pay more attention now-I make an effort to remind myself, that good or bad, it’s going to pass-and that while a series of moments lie ahead, they too are only temporary.
As a child I did better. My thoughts were consumed of only what I was doing at that very moment- such as eating a bag of popcorn or watching cartoon. Then, in my teenage years, I started to dwell on the tomorrow; i.e. what to wear the next day or how to be popular. I got older and society and parents taught me to think about what I want to be when I grow up! What to study, how to make money, when to get married and have kids. Consequently, as I was doing the “right thing”, and rightfully so, I forgot to enjoy what it means to be a free spirit, or recognize my potential during the earlier years of life. As a result, I didn’t take the time to enjoy my studies, take more general education, learn a new language, or even learn to relax.
The loss of the present moment becomes more apparent when I look at old photos: photos that take me back to what I was feeling when I took the picture or the moment that I first saw the photo-whether I liked it or not-how critical I was of my face, hair or makeup-but then ten years later, I see the same photo and wonder when my face aged, and how ignorant I was of my youth. Yet, I catch myself repeating the same scenario this new decade-zillion of moments later!
At 39, I ran my first Los Angeles marathon. Having finished it, I was proud-yet, it was another reminder of how much better I would have done had I been 18. Even when I did finish it, I wanted to do better right away, consequently, losing that moment, once again.
Marcus Aurelius , a roman emperor and philosopher, said “Time is a violent torrent; no sooner is a thing brought to sight than it is swept by, and another takes its place, before this too will be swept away”. As I get older, I pay more attention now-I make an effort to remind myself, that good or bad, it’s going to pass-and that while a series of moments lie ahead, they too are only temporary.
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